Word.

Since starting university in the Fall, I feel like I've become a different person. My first semester challenged me in a way that I didn't expect it to. I started developing anxiety because I was focussed on achieving perfection in all areas of my life. I now realize that being calm is more important to me than being productive. I started questioning why I do the things I do. Why am I studying art? Is being good at something enough of a reason to study it? I am now discovering what is really important to me. In the past I mostly did what other people expected of me. Going to university wasn't something that I decided to do for myself but something that I thought I was supposed to do. But now, I'm really happy that I'm here and I know why I'm here. I realized that I need to say "no" sometimes and that you can't actually do everything. You have to choose what you want to do. It's scary though. Living according to yourself instead of what other people think of you takes strength. One of the things that has guided me through this "path of self discovery" is a book. I heard about the book a few years ago on Oprah but I dismissed it until my sister recommended it to me. I started reading "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle and I would recommend this book to everybody. It is about presence, acceptance of the moment and being. This book is helping me to be more calm and confident in myself. It also helped me recognize my need for alone time. This book has changed the way I view the world. My new outlook affects me everyday. I feel that the teachings in this book will be a big influence on my art in the new year because it has affected me so much. If my art doesn't speak directly about the contents of the book, I feel that my process will be influenced by it. I feel like I've found a new creativity within the stillness that I am cultivating.